Feeding The Void

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By Yours Truly.
Please don’t mind my terrible punuation; I truly didn’t plan to be at this place with my image in my early twenties. I remember growing up and always feeling awkward about being, well…lanky and slopped over in a sense. I was small breasted for a long time. So that was something I always wondered about. When was I going to get some titties! In time you grow up, and things begin to fall into place. I never was the girl that wore tight clothes, or showed the goods. I was a little tomboyish I liked my baggy shorts and t-shirts with odd things written on them. Like ‘brat’ interesting enough. Glad I made through a bit more stylish now a days. I didn’t start paying really close attention to my body until I turned 18. Amazing huh, I spent my teenage years worrying about things teens SHOULD not have to worry about. I think something that will have a profound impact on body image, is really considering sitting down and explaining to our young women of the future about body image, ways to deal with being happy, and the most important healthy lifestyle. It really doesn’t seem like my community takes too much concern in health care. I most definitely believe that being ‘healthy’ is a fundamental part in society. Maybe someone should offer free classes for single mothers on nutrition. As much as they like to say the shit is out there… It really isn’t.
I could go on and on about this but I can say this contributed to the things that are to come that brought me to this place where I absolutely felt compelled to tell this story. I have seen so many friends of mine going thru the same thing. It breaks your spirit. It pretends to be your best friend. It is the Kleenex to your tears after he doesn’t call. It doesn’t talk back or have the wrong perception of you.
It is something you need for survival but can cripple your survival all in the same moment and breath. You never been starving but always hungry to climb this ladder and these expectations the society would like to call success. It has taken me my entire life to get to the point where I am right now, mentally and emotionally everyday is a struggle. I look in the mirror and wish I could bewitch my way out being ‘chubby’ but the reality is, by America’s standards…Whatever that is anyways. I am considered obese. Now with this being said, do I feel out of shape definitely. I am overweight in this moment in time. Yes, but. I have zero desire to be slim. It’s just now what I want. I like being 160 even if I am short. That what makes me happy and that is all that should matter. YOUR happiness. YOUR dreams. The resolution starts with you. If you come to this turning point where in yourself you see mistakes, flaws, beautiful things, a strong woman, a go getter etc... Then you can turn your destiny around be you once you have the quality to know that is a bigger, brighter picture.
So let me know how you feel about Feeding the Void, there is most definitely more to come and feel free to submit ideas and stories to sodamnglam@gmail.com xoxo.

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