Fckin' Sweet.

Missing A Loved One..

2012-01-16T05:06:00.001-08:00

I think the hardest thing that has ever happened to me in my life is the lost of my Aunt Esther. I still wait for her knowing she won't return. I try to access my feelings but I stay gridlocked. Closure is never easy but it doesn't mean it doesn't happen....

Just saying hello

2012-01-15T17:39:00.001-08:00

HI!

The Master Cleanse: The Decision

2011-12-02T22:55:00.000-08:00

I have went over this a million times in my head, in my plans. Everyone has mixed feelings about it but ultimately its up to you and the decision you choose. I was introduced to it a few years ago when I was younger. I remember thinking "This shit is nuts." No eating? We are going to die. This past winter I did it for about 15 days. I can honestly say I felt so many emotions, my mind was clearer, I felt better, I was able to rid my cold w/in a day or two and i usually stay sick for up to a week. I was ecstatic to lose those pounds too!

My relationship with food is ruining my progression with the cleanse. I have become so dependant on eating my feelings i cannot even start or finish the cleanse like I have conquered before. How does mind over matter work? Because that all it at the end of the day. I always aim for 40 days. It seems rather easy. How to I schedule things to work?

Friend, Foe, and Folktales

2011-06-20T10:57:00.000-07:00

Honestly, in this point in my life. I am can say I am transitioning into real adulthood. It takes alot of bullshit to get you to the point where you are like. Damn, shit is changing. Fast. If you choose to take the high road and start really living. Doesn't make sense? Let me explain. You can be alive and not living life due to many reasons. Family, friends, your job, your student loans, your depression, your pain. There can be a million reasons or excuses you can use to prevent you from living life. The real horror is that we refuse to acknowledge the smallest things that really MAKE life worth living.

I feel like I have spent more time lying to myself, and running from the solutions instead of creating a new movement. I think alot of time we discouraged by the things that we are scared to take on. And alot of time you don't realize the negative entities that are keeping you complacent. I think I should stop here.

peace.

Activity Board Adminstration

2011-06-20T00:04:00.000-07:00

I decided to chatterbox with you all for a moment since I have been gone a majority of the year dedicating myself to a bunch of shit that didn't work out for me anyways. I decided why not dedicate myself to my own shit. SO that way when shit doesn't go the way I want, at least I know I was putting effort into myself and not anyone else. But people don't read anymore anyways so it doesn't matter. Unless I can trick you into reading by tweeting. "My pussy lips" or some other vulgar nonsense to get you to read what you never WANTED to waste 4 mins on reading anyways...Don't get me wrong I have enjoyed some of the things and various ventures but its definitely time to decide what will be done. I called myself halfway ass designing this too. Oh blah you get it. Welcome back doe

Maury: An Inside Look On Blatant Bullshit

2010-10-04T11:05:00.000-07:00

Sigh. Its been a long time since I been over here. 'I ain't gonna lie' I really like tumblr better. But that's neither here nor there. But I guess I still have some sort of commitment to blogger. Ill buy a domain name one damn day. I promise.

Okay, so. Why are we still watching Maury? For the same reason we INEXPLICABLY, still find a way to be entertained by Meer Kat. I don't reference her by name anymore. Sue Me. She is anonymous. Anywoot, We already know its a trainwreck, but I guess trainwrecks are interesting to watch?! Don't Judge Me. I just added that cause i needed something else to say. So I just got some solutions. And some Screencaps, holla at young thug.

I am tired. Of people being named ignant shit like Tajuana. But its none of my business my name is Pam which isn't more more desirable. When I was 16, I was scared to even so much remotely do anything to piss my aunt off, and too scared to be in a gang. When children do things like this. 8 of 10 its because lack of attention. Stay on your kids. Be strict, but understanding. They will be okay, and when in doubt knock they monkey ass out.

Clearly, he ain't the motherfucking father. Why do you do this? For a free trip and hotel stay, cause, this right here is pure bullshit. Further more. WHAT.

Clearly, the damn captions write themselves. When you draw on MircoBrows, expect to be cheated on. Cause this means. Your walking around the house looking like Montel Williams all the damn time, he doesn't have eyebrows right? Furthermore, your main will look somewhere else if you start to look like a mexican Snooki. justsayindoe.

I never knew you had to have a spiritual aura to be the father of child. You look and sound like a real coon.

Marisol. Makes ME cringe. This is proof that true sloots come in all shapes n sizes. 16 men brought the show. Are you serious? What does your vagina have to say about this? I really highly doubt that one person can have that much unprotected sex. I guess where your from, they don't give out free condoms? I would only pray that Miss Marisol is taking care of her children. And the grow up to never, ever find out about the Maury show.

The Maury Show is a insult to our intelligence, but none the less. Its still tragic but yet ole fashioned tv.

Allowing You Into Me

2010-05-16T04:28:00.000-07:00

There is this guy. I am terribly smitten, butterflies, etc about. I don't trust happiness enough to be satisfied. That this could be a reality. Look what relationships, stress, dating does to the average woman. I fill my head with doubt to the point where...I'm not allowing myself to even let go of..."He could be like this, I don't think this is real..." I could go on. I made a personal promise to stop listing things. Cause it looks funny on a blog. I'm just wondering what will it take for me to let you into me withOUT any reservation or fear...

Things That Are Unattractive About Men?

2010-04-10T13:18:00.000-07:00

Since everyone wants to hop on the train to hell and discuss women and their short comings all the fucking time. Like men or women are walking around being some sort of savory sense of anything less that ~~WHAT they ARE or ARE NOT.~~

Things That Are Unattractive About Men.

1) Over-Confidence.
Who told you that your were a force to be reckon with? Anybody can put on skinny jeans have a African Friend with a credit card get you VIP service in Atlanta Elite NightClub Pictures. Confidence is fine. Over doing it. IS NOT.

2) Musty Dick Dave WHO always Expects Fellations.
I know too many negros who are still just washing they chest in the shower and forgetting the other body parts. And just when you thought you had waited two whole weeks to give MR.MUSTY DICK some pussy. His dicknballs smells like Similac. And still expects most women to be cool with that. Half of you don't even do enough to deserve the pussy. LET ALONE SOME BRAIN. Cause you thinking outside of your box.

3) Yo MONEY this...
Great handclap for you to be making MONEY. Why are you proud about some shit a 32year grown ass man needs to be doing anyways. Why do you feel you need verification about some coins? Its always the term 'money' being thrown around in your conversation leads me to believe you really ain't got the shit. Cause...WHAT'S KNOWN DOESN'T NEED TO BE DISCUSSED.

4) ROOMATES!
Its a little past unsavory to find out two grown ass men that are not in college, got kids and girlfriends. Are living with each other. If you are not enrolled to a university. NOT community college. There is no reason for you to be sleeping in the same house with another GROWN ass man. For what reason? You should be at the point where you are financially stable enough to pay rent for yourself. If not Use the same excuse every other negro does. "I got my mom living with me cause I wanted to help her out" And I guess you decorated this Home & Garden ass Bathroom too?

5) Excuses...SOUND like lies.
You always ALWAYS. Got an excuse for everything. And to be honest. IT SOUNDS LIKE A DAMN LIE. Why must you always have a rebuttal for simple shit.

"I had a missed call from you david."
"Oh, I had called you cause I didn't know how to work my thing"
"What?,"
"The uh, wifi thing in the box I couldn't make it to your house cause my car caught on fire"
"Did you end up dying in the fire too?"
"No."

6) BabyMOMS & Kids
Okay. I ain't a total bitch. There is a life before me and there will be one after. But here are some issues i have. About 89% of you negros, swear that YOU and the baby moms are not getting along. Or whatever the case may be but you are still in these secret relationships with this woman or still beating down the block every chance you get which would lead me to believe that you are STILL in denial. Finish your situation before trying stick your dick in everything that walks. Its fine to fall out of love, you lose interest etc... But do it the right way. I don't want to be involved in your messy bullshit. And I don't need somebody calling me about they damn babydaddy.

NOW kids. Why don't you take care of your kids? You sit and talk about how much you love em, all the money you spend child support. But you got like one picture from 6 years ago and he is 19 now. I mean really. If you cannot take the effort to get involved in your child life, what makes me think THAT you can be responsible enough to carry on a relationship with me?

7) I know more than ANYBODY cause I DONE everything!
Good for you. Every time i say something its no surprise you done been there done that..
"I used to dance naked in the sand"
YOU: "I dance naked on the ocean in Cali yo"
Bitch boo bye! You aint cultured cause you went to the beach! CUTITOUT. Just because you have been living life doesn't make you MORE wise, MORE efficient or more KNOWLEDGEABLE. So just cut the damn Taye Diggs acting shit out.

8) My CAR is in the shop ass nigga.
You don't have a car neither do i. So lets head over to metro and get these bus passes. You ain't got to lie. TO KICK IT.

9) ~~Outdated.~~
Everything about your ass is screaming 1998. Please go on ahead. and STOP.

10) You want a Bentley bitch but you a Chevy Aveo ass NEGRO.
This is pretty self explanatory it goes out to about 99% of men I know.

11) Rappers. Overseas Sports Athletes, NWM.
OH you a rapper?! or famous because you got a twitter or myspace. Die slow.

12) The Neverending Saga
Oh woe is me! Oh my life my hardships, my pain, MY sorrow. YOU are a poetically unjustifiable ass runaway. You think me feeling sorry for you is about to help you get some pussy. It isn't.

13) Self RIGHTEOUS MR KNOW IT ALLS.
you met this man before. He has all the answers to nothing. Instead of being a man. He hides in sheeps clothing and fancy words. He claims to have a right of passage that is a KNOWLEDGE but his brain is about the closet thing to ignorance then the twel-ellebin hunnid mother fucking dollars you accept from a multi-millionaire. These are the men that get in private and wanna dog you out cause you don't want to give them ass. But in the same breath sit and preach that women have no morality, or guidance. Yeah. I am damn sick of NIGGERS like Cthegod. Why would you characterize your self with a name like 'god' you are barely even credible enough to touch the collection plate, but god? Yeah. RIGHT. These are the same men that have no problem wrapping their mouths around a mans dick in private. SUBMISSIVE MEN. YOU JUST TYPE IN CAPITAL LETTERS AND SILLY FONT. A real man has positive uplifting things to say about the counterpart that is a woman. NOT every opportunity that you receive you BELITTLE them but these are the same women who try to support you because WE try to reach deep down and believe that you CAN BE THE VOICE OF REASON. Most of the time you all end up disappointing us. You give us AIDS from sleeping around, you DECREASE our population because you kill us with cancers you create in our breasts and hearts from the pain you cause. We LOVE you men to the end and all you can sit around and do is call us basic and belittle and DISRESPECT US. I will not stand for it. You are the same men that have black women dying their hair blonde and denying their race because the YEARN for your approval.
You have them wearing curly hair and checking biracial. YOU have them stuffing implants in their cheasts. You have them LAYING on a table injecting their asses. all because BLACK WOMEN want to be everything you want us to be. I won't can't and DON'T GIVE A FLYING FUCK ABOUT YOUR STANDARDS. You want us to do do DO. Worry about your damn self. I don't say shit when I see you not paying your taxes, or when you ain't taking care of your kids, or when your out here killing your brothers, or when your selling dope on the corner to someones, mother or father. BUT you are a messiah of knowledge? You types are vile and beneath every woman i know. And I pray you mothers can forgive your sorry asses.

Aint Shit List

2010-03-10T18:39:00.000-08:00

I was putting a few people on my "Ain't Shit" list, right..?...right!

And before I get into this, lemme splain the ASL:

People who aint shit go here.

Got that? yaaasss! Okay, so...you get on the list by doing some Aint Shit type shit.

Examples, facts, details, and thangs:
WE make plans, YOU break them, ANDDDD I find out about this because I just so happened to be checking to make sure the aforementioned plans were still intact by caling you and asking you..........it's one thing to fuck up some plans.. A WHOLE 'NOTHER ISSUE when your sorry ass doesnt even think to mention it. And the fact that I KNOW I've got to call certain people to make sure they not on that fuckshit a day ahead is just.....ugh.

So anywhore, thats one situation..I would outline a few more but I'se hongree and this shit done took long enough...so, let's cut to the point...

As I was adding people to this list, I realized that 99.9% of my "friends" are on it and really when I say friends, I mean associates...and really, when I say associates, I mean fuck you.

As of this moment, I have bout a handful of (if not less) people that I will acknowledge as friends. I would totally pull a Drunken Pamela move and write about them specifically but I hope they know who they are. However, I will eventually do that...just not now...fried chicken beckons.

Exceeding The Limtations.

2010-03-05T21:58:00.000-08:00

I have come in contact with so many young talented women. Everyone is on the quest to find themselves on this journey we call "Life". I mean I have been blessed to even have contact with some of the MOST amazing people. I think that really. It gives you a different perspective on things when you can get a glimpse of something, and someone else. Not the form of imitation but I would say the opportunity to explore what others are facing in this challenging time(s) Of womanhood. I guess we are supposed to be mourning over the loss of the 'blackmenthatdontwantus'.

What is the standing factor in your life that makes you DECIDE that to overcome is what ULTIMATELY be the biggest and entire goal. Some days I want to paint some days I want to draw. Some days I want to lay by my windowseal and write poetry. In a perfect world we would be able to do the things we love. But its became so much of survival the of the fittest. You can't enjoy the things you love. The things that make you happy. Cause you gotta work. My life becoming filled up with 'work'. Everyone suggests I should do this. Or that. Or this or that. I am good at doing a LOT of stuff. But that doesn't mean I am mentally or physically able to do everything. I just know honestly. Being an 'employee' Is not really my tea. I cannot picture myself. As that being my final destiny. Like damn..That's it? Work for the state. Your bills. And how do your reward yourself. With saying 'I got my own'? Who gives a shit? I want to reward myself with really saying. I OWN MY OWN.

The best reward is shit that is PAID FOR.

I want to shed some knowledge on some flawless women. Who I am so glad I had the chance, blessing, honor, of running into to. I am linking them at giving the information cause these are most definitely people you should know. My year has been a blessing because of each one of them.

No particular order. So Please don't DO ME. As my loved one would say:

Jorielle
If you look up flawless and witty you will find her picture. This girl at such a young age. Holds wisdom beyond her years. Sometimes I ask her for advice. She is just her. And that is something YOU have to just love.

Cserena
Girl. GIRL you really are just a all around nice girl. There is not a single flaw. You always have such a posititve attitude. And You are really beating to your own drum. Really Special person to me. When I felt like quitting you said " GIRL NO!"
lots of love for you.

Jewel
Now we been through so much. We been tight from beginning to end. Im glad your getting married. Im glad for my two beautiful best friends that are your daughters. Thank GOD for you dropping knowledge.

Zeralyn
My ace. I never thought in a million years. I would fall in love again. I mean. This is the mirror image. She speaks her mind. But understands the beauty of individuality. Some times i want to choke the shit outta her. But i love her.

Christine
This woman has captivated me. Her blog is everything. She is just raw. Not nasty raw. But the beautiful raw that is something makes you say.. I understand. This is what I been trying to say. You look at her and say. This is what every one should inspire towards..

Loany
I have a funny story about how we met. She is dope. And so am I. This girl is going to be something special. She is everything but cliche. If i was asked to describe her in one word. Circle. Evolutionary and never-ending.

Nancy
There has been long nights where i bet Nancy said. I wish this bitch would JUST go to sleep. But she will stay. And make me smile. I got that ole school love for you...

Krissy
To be honest. This GIRL upon first sight. Is a straight Halle Berry. But the fact that she is hilarious, sweet, and just honestly a good all around girl. Makes me so happy I met her.

Madison
Girl. My sister my heart. My nearest and dearest. I love her. This is the EPITOME of real. I know she would do anything for me and vice versa. I wouldn't trade you for anything. She is goal-orientated and NEVER gives up no matter what obstacles in her way. When I think the world has given up on me. She is nudging me in the shoulder telling me to keep pushing.

Lynn
Me and this girl have been thru highs and lows. No matter what we have had each others back. This is someone I wouldn't trade for the world.

Crissle
Sometimes I find myself feeling like i want to smack the dog shit outta someone. I will cry and scream.Take a deep breath. And she will have me feeling better by her silly shit in no time. I treat her blog like Christmas. Special Event. Once In a lifetime.

Im not done. Just give me a second. Im too drunk for this. Amen.

Telephone.

2010-02-20T16:54:00.000-08:00

Setting Boundries & Verifying Lanes

2010-02-17T21:54:00.000-08:00

Lets start off with honesty. Because it is a tool that provides me to be able to stick to the man. And be able to just do the nothing that i do. I sell rabbits and talk shit and get paid.

NickiMinajinYoHeauxs

SO with that being said...There is this misconception that everyone is great at...

something. I just hope everyone sends this to its proper folks of error cause we can do better if we what...

WORK TWOGETHER!

Rapper: I want to call you up personally and say what your mama, baby moms, and entire group of homeboys been wanting to tell you. NIGGA you suck. Your lyrical content is about as basic as lilduval entire existence.
Managers: Okay. This is sensitive but if the shoe fits. Walk TEN toes down. If you been around this same negro for about...3 to 5 months now. And you ain't made you enough young monnay to buy you a volkswagen beetle. But you done been in 4535 videos, and polished all his homies. Your just a pussy prop. UnSNOOKI yourself and get it together. Damn bumpit.
Some Company with NO LLC/PHONEBOOK listing and you have 23,3455 Followers. The end.
Models...I could but couldn't and shouldn't. Models who make money have these things..Resume,CompCards,Portfolio (and pictures with clothes on professionally aimed towards them not the baffroom mirror)WEBSITE<<--- MYSPACE is not a fucking portfolio. That is a place for you to get pregnant and get gonorrhea stay off that shit.
Atlanta Georgia You ain't special. You ain't near hollywood. I know i live inside of you. But you have attracted some weak bitch ass people here. And I will never forgive you for this shit. You owe me some money. AND these men. Should date each other. I ain't interested.
Calls After 7pm You violating. You moving out of my comfort zone nigga its night time you trynna insult me? You only wanna call me after dark cause you think imma 'big booty freak' your wrong. I have sex like a mexican.
Weaves(s) Come on. You heffas getting too attached to some shit that ain't yours..."I bought it" And? "Its not just weave its remy indian premium shipped." -deep yawn- Stop letting rope hang and choke you heffas.
GROUPIES women embrace your groupie the same heffas who scream this "I ain't no groupie" is the same bitch that sat outside of Lil wayne bathroom stall in 05. Funny thing is. IF you aren't a groupie cool. Let them be them. Stop looking bitter and complaining that this is the reason why you can't find no damn man. Nah, There are more women on earth than men. Thats why you cannot find a man. Lick some pussy and move on. Men stop saying groupies this and groupies that. You still pay them to fuck and hang around and make appear to seem somewhat relevant. Your wife is a groupie. And she will have half of your monnay I don't care if you met her at 1st catherdal meddlepole baptist. Its a recession. Teachers dance at stripclubs and moms slang dope. Blame your government.
Online Personality Funny thing about me is. You can literally ask someone how long has this girl acted fucking nutty. And they will say..Forever. Some of you get behind this screen and create balls that exist only in the mind of another mans penis.I have had some random folks that supposed to be somebodies get in my DM box, and act a dry durex fool. And some of your ladies do the same. Your child is sitting right next to your punk ass with a stapler while you tinychat your titties. Or now you blawggin and famous. But I know that you still be beggin for napkins and achooing on babywipes. Don't get it, then leave it alone.

Morality Lesson.

ho sit down. - maceo.
and remain seated until someone ushers you onto a better life. You making yourself look well...normal..EMBRACE normal. cause thats what you are. STOP reaching to be great. when your just....

normal.

'Skin' Never LOOKED So Good.

2010-01-28T07:38:00.000-08:00

I think she is absolutely breathtaking. And being 'different' is the added accentuation.

Stay In Your Lane.

2010-01-27T17:29:00.000-08:00

Did you know? I'm NOT the one want to debate with?

Here we go. I am truly annoyed by people in every way. I am about to start kicking it with martians n shit. I cannot stand when PEOPLE think they are VALID enough to tell you, about you NIGGA you don't even know me. HOW you think you know me, CAUSE we have talked on the phone? Oh so now you the master of my entire mind. BEAT IT.

I hate this shit. NOTHING irkes my nerves more than people forming an opinion about you and DON'T even know you. I at least take time to dislike you for a reason. SHIT is redundant. I have opinions, I have a mind, I SAY WHAT the fuck I want. If you don't like that I am sorry. I am no longer pacifying babies or bitches. YOU need to conquer your own attitude and MOVE on. People kill me telling you what to do with YOURSELF. NIGGA i belong to me!

I will KEEP doing the best THING for me! CAUSE im me. WORRY about you. That is what keeps motherfuckers in the same position for years! IF YOU aint gonna follow the hustle. Learn what makes the person successful STFU talking shit then. I have the higher and upper power cause of my richness of mind! AND you are just a dumb fuck NOW how can you change that??

Get like me. and STFU until then.

Dear Americans....

2010-01-24T13:40:00.000-08:00

Can't Get Right

2010-01-15T08:06:00.000-08:00

This morning was rough. I cried a lot. I know it's hard to understand why someone who seems 'tough' is melting down as adults, I think we all get to the point where situations become clearer and everything makes sense after breaking things down in their perspective order. No-one wants to lead a life of sadness, No-one wants to finish last place. The reality is all of us aren't built to be the best. Some people are just mediocre cause they allow themselves to be. Some just can't past all of the things that make it 'hard to get over'. I know me, I cannot allow myself not to be the best. Even it takes me 30 years to be the best me. I can be satisfied. Cause I worked hard to be the best. I have been struggling to understand why I am here. What is my purpose? The more I look around the less support and love, I have from the people I put my all into. I told my 'love' I cannot help that I care, as much as I say "IMMA BE MEAN" "FUCK THE WORLD" unfortunately I don't have it in me to actually feel that way. I care about everyone. I am always being considerate. I always try to do what I can to help anyone that needs it. That is just the type of person I am. Everyone needs support even if it just mental. We all need it. It builds the person, not making you but its a big part in forming you. With high hopes I get tired of saying "Ima be optimistic!' But for what? Being optimistic is a cop out. You don't need optimism you need motivation to get you to where you wanna be. I thin k alot of times we say stuff like that with a cloud of doubt surrounding it. All my life by everyone I have been treated like the so-so family pet. I am loved.Often forgot about, Ignored, the same love i show them they do not show it back if i get hoit or bit. It's always "You'll Be Alright!" and i am being ignored all over again. I have tried to over look the fact that my family treats me this way. My entire life I have been shuffled from home to home. And people acting as if I was a pest. Just a child. With a bad parent. It seems like my entire life has been on false hopes. So what is what everyone would say. pain is still pain and its has and NAME cause it doesn't feel good. Everyone has become "Condoms" its safe to tellme or someone some corny qote or message "its ok" "everyone goes thru it" DAMN that shit. Hit me with the truth. I am tired of quotes. I NEED SOLUTION. I wish people cared about me the same WAY i extend myself out. NOW i have nothing left of me. And that is why I say I am losing touch with myself.

I'm Just Sayin'

2010-01-12T11:43:00.001-08:00

(._. *) "Brrrrrrrrrrr aaaaa-AAAAHHHHH"--@TrapMuzik617

#Burrr

2010-01-12T10:47:00.000-08:00

"It's so coooooooooooooooooooold in The A!

How the fuck do we 'posed ta keep faith?!"

While you were watching Young Melo hit the dougie in her ernge nightshirt, I was also watching..shamelessly and intently. :)

Uhm I'm just here talkin shit cuz I NEED to be recording a new youtube video for my channel but uh ( ._.)... you know how it be..right?...right...? no..?..well shyyyd I gotchall next WEEK! I promithe, guythes! (my lisp comes out when I'm lying)

OH SHIT! Presdential just came on..brb

*jiggalates¹*

Okay, I'm back and shit...

Shoul-Da-Lean just came on but I'ma stay here and type...or try to..

Ya'll heard how Keyshia Cole stopped fuckin wit her family? I can't blame her. Niggas be aggravatin. Family or no, I ain't fina have yo Shifty McPsychoface ass disturbing my everyday life. Speaking of which...here is some vital information for YOUR everyday life:

"If both of ya'll under 25, it aint love. Satcho young ass down and read a book."

&LOVEdior

1: Jiggalate: urbandictionary.com [screencap]

The Battle Within.

2010-01-06T12:42:00.000-08:00

Please watch. Weight, Lack of Weight Misconceptions come in many different sizes and textures. If you wouldn't consider overeating, Or comfort eating a problem You could consider anorexia one as well. They are all dressed in blue. Just different sizes.

Where Are My Manners?

2009-12-30T04:44:00.000-08:00

WHOMP! I didnt introduce myself and shit...well uh...I'm Jorielle Dior, I have an affinity for all things zebra-printed, fuckery-filled, and brightly colored. My hair changes colors with out warning and blah blah so on and so forth.

I have been invited to blog on this fine blog and I will do just that. Thank you in advance for putting up with me.

lanks and shit:

twitter http://twitter.com/joridior

you-fuckin-tube http://www.youtube.com/user/di0r21

You have a mouth. Use it, and use it well.

2009-12-30T04:04:00.001-08:00

...And then there was language.

Language may be the basis of humankind because it is the foundation of that by which we survive and thrive amongst one another---COMMUNICATION.

With that being said, I must say that you people, you humans, do NOT utilize language enough. Let me tell you all where I am going with this shit before you doze off and/or resume watching bullshit on you-muthafuckin-tube. Now, see me and my dawg, Ina were having a chittery chat about some recent emotional turbulence I'd experienced in my relationship¹ with a certain male. I was frustrated with his wishy-washiness and fuck-foolery. We have this back, back, back n' forth thing going and I am sicketh of ITeth. Because I honestly want him to pick a gotdamn side and shit. RED OR BLUE, NIGGA! RED OR FUCKING BLUE! Cuz, really, they are both cool colors and either one would tickle my Creole fancy....but homie is giving me all types of Purple.

and so it went a lil sumn like this²:

inadabawsee 6:27 am
You gave him a inch (friendship) he took a mile (flirting)
jjFAD 6:34 am
and why the hell did he throw it all the fuck away overnight?
inadabawsee 6:34 am
Lol he a nigga they stupid

Now, see there, folks!?

When you fail to be clear on what it is YOU want, you look stupid!! Your actions do indeed speak louder than words, but, honey that doesn't mean the words are invalid. What you tell a person lays the foundation of what they are to expect from you. Do not talk to me about leggings and show up with fuckin sweatpants! I'll be confused for a moment, then angry, and then like...why?

this post has turned into a sleep-deprived ramble, but i think there are some real gems in here..somewhere. To clear any fuzziness, I'll go ahead an make a list of my 5 key points:

Force yourSELF to stand by every fucking thing you say...granted, this is impossible cuz well..shit happens..but, the pressure you put on yourSELF to remain thorough will cause your lil MOUTHpeice to get you into less shit that you cannot commit to.
JUST.
SAY.
WHAT'S.
REAL.

&LOVEdior

1: a relation between people. period.

2: AIM s/n's have been changed to protect the overzealous from getting skeeted & treated via IM service.

Girl, STOP.

2009-12-29T08:27:00.000-08:00

Let's start this shit off by knowing my facial expression...

Girls. Girls. I cannot call YOU women when you clearly act like kids. So it is what it ISith. See there is a fine line between WOMEN and GIRLS. And Please dont mistake me for either. I AM A FUCKING BEAST, google beastyassmoondust. I am so over the fact that everyone is being terribly cliche! and MOST of all PREDICTABLE. i SEE you feathers flocking and sucking designer dicks and contracting LABEL stds. Everyone of you want to be a writer now? GFOH -> Your just stealing vintage thoughts I and a few others thought in 2007. Read my MYSPACE. Thin ideas, get SAT on. There is not an ounce originality in nothing you Minajs, Boyhymed, Loubie Feeted' STILL FAKE BAG wearing heffas are doing. Very Unassuming. These lovely girls, will be the final result for any of my 2009 issues. You will be the girl I use as my coaster cup. To place my purple DRANK. When will you start chasing the real dream? YOUR life. I wish girls, would stop IMITATING women. This life i lead, is a grown woman's life. Shit it might have flaws. I can admit that. Anything that perceived TO be perfect is something I never care to meet.

With this being said. Leave WOMEN out of your issues.
Making it hard, cause EVERY negro expects us to BE basic like you.

Holding Yourself FROM Greatness.

2009-12-20T00:26:00.000-08:00

-first things, 1st I would like to thank @justnancyp (via twitter) for this subject.

What I am about to do is really brave, but its needed to free a part of myself. To release the sadness, to overcome the obstacles, To honestly be THE best me, I figure I would have to break down the issues. Ask For Help, except criticism. Love myself enough TO truly love and appreciate my dreams.

I can do so many things but for some strange reason I am so scared of me. I say I want these things but why not strive to be the best and make the best happen with these things?

Pros and Cons. Fears and Sorrows. Friends and Foes. HATE that i LOVE to hate YOU.

1 + 1 = 1

2009-12-02T10:47:00.000-08:00

Into your eyes I have seen many heartaches
You come with soul red and your dreams blue
catching your remembrance in which we partake
The loneliness has numbered you play out, over and thou
several demons crossing over into one slice to break
a hero has kissed your lips to give life to the passion you grew
for you, yourself onto you...

Scared of Fame...Suicide of Lonely.

2009-11-25T21:05:00.001-08:00

Its funny, when you initially meet me five minutes later I can be a open book if you let yourself subside this area. Not saying that is a good nor great thing. My life to me has always been beautifully tragic. Meaning some moments are so in awe you wouldn't believe. Its like tasting something that was so delectable but the contents were tragic. The things that it took to compose THIS thing you love, YOU lust is tragic. I have given people ALL of me in anything and everything. TO the point where their pain effected me. You try to rationalize 'Why would one do such a thing?' if i could tell you. Suicide

In anyone's sake, i remember being a little girl. And thinking heroes were liars. I used to tell the teacher, I don't like that word. I remember my mom saying just make something up. HOW can you make a hero? No one seemed to understand. Heroes are make believe sure, there are real life heroes who rescue people from the fire. Or save the cat from the tree. But where are the heroes who save the souls? Where are the heroes that save you from poverty and despair, not superman. Or the man that got the kitty out the tree. Looking back at being 8 thinking that. I been a little old lady for some while now.

Point being made to me the same beauty, the same vibrance this world used to hold. Its very lackluster. The dullness is spread across. Because allowing yourself to fall victim to the should and wouldas OF this unpronounced FAME! is unjust. Not everyone is built to be a brickhouse, just like every brain is not meant to function correctly NO matter how bad we want it to. WIth that being said. I don't spotlight. I don't want false hopes and expectations to live up to. Cause with this fame, comes the dark side, I am already sitting in the shade.

I am taking suicide of this endless lonely and hanging from a shabby hotel shower. I been alone so in being alone. You learn to be in lust, in love with lonely and if that ain't TRAGIC. I don't know what is.

......

She said hold your breath
So you don't cum away from me
Too soon
Then I forgot what I was goin'
To tell you
When the summer air
Blew in the day
Change white to gray
I laid with you
And felt your body reach its peak
Did I hear you say
Come harder baby
So I can feel your waist vibrate
When white turns to gray
I laid with you
White turns to gray
I laid with you
You
I laid with you

You know you stayed away too long
Did you miss me
Looks like your heartbeat is rushing
Sick of rushing
But woah
It's still good
I feel you all on me
Can you feel me too
When the summer air blew in
Change white to gray
I layed with you
And felt your body reach its peak
I hear you say
come harder baby
So I can feel your waist vibrate
When white turns to gray
When white turns to gray

New Old POST - Karrine Steffans...The light at the end of the tunnel.

2009-11-02T01:19:00.000-08:00

Old blog. October 4th, 2007.
The points are still relevant.

Every Little Step I Take.....

she will be there.?

Last night I came across a hip hop blog while downloading music. I started to check her little site out and became intrigued by all this nonsense.What the fuck is the world coming to. Don't answer that yet.I have kinda be researching 'Superhead' and have come to see. That we can blame people in society for us looking like baffoons. So for this thank you very much 'cum guzzler'.
I have a hate/love realtionship with this whole situation so there is are a series of questions i have for my readers which i will address at the end of this blog.

me being a reader of the first book.

It left me with mixed feelings about her. Now after seeing her site and reading blogs, and listening to these radio interviews you see a person who has not changed not ONE bit. And it's fine if you haven't changed just admit to that. and KEEP it real. She is just repeating the cycle, I don't see any growth or progression. From being the black female extortionist of the USA. She says's things like "that these people were nobodies?" NOW if that were really true. She would not have became a best seller right. She would have been a whore writing a book about being a whore.Detroit Interview they spoke on my thoughts exactly. And further more sucking a dick is not excuse for your son. In many interviews she brings him up. She would really stop using him as an excuse for the things, you could have prevented. Whatever you do, do. Be 100% not 85% cause it's starting to look like history repeating itself? Doesn't It. So that means. YOU not setting an single example. for anyone not even your self.It is quite disturbing. Because she really is beautiful woman and I can agree with different aspects of the things she says but there is a very fine line. I cannot stand behind being real part that seems to be keep being thrown out there. I do indeed commend her for getting paid for her slut exploits.

good shit. So my point is for the 2008 will there be other cocksuckers willing to write books about fucking celebs go for it.! Gossip always sells itself. So i guess she will always be ahead right? Or a bestseller i should say in plain terms.
THEN.

this weave is horrendous. _________.insert your comments there.
then she has a totally different outcome on life when she is on the Oprah show versus her rants on the Foxxhole with my father Jamie Foxx. Interview with Jamie Foxx. I sat and listened to the whole hour and 30 mins of it just because I listen before I make comments. My mother has had went threw tuns of shit. I spent my whole life on welfare and taking care of my own mother when she should have been taking care of me. But I'll be damned if and when I get a child I will use the reason for the things I do, because of them. Sure sometimes there is a right to say I wouldn't be working this hard, or I wouldn't make these sacrifices if it were not for my child, but for it to be the story of your life and you repeat the EXACT pattern two years later. Shows me that you are, your own personal con artist. You trying convince yourself of these things.
I do commend her for certain things she has said as far as you are going to receive more as a woman if you have your shit together men with money feel more inclined to a woman who has her life together that whole fiasco because I see it first hand because of my dancing experiences. BUT the contradictions lie so damn deep that it makes you wonder how one can even be so setforth with the things that they say. There is just no substance to cars and clothes that mental can lock hold on.

so can someone sign me up for the free money goodies bag. I want to talk a bunch of shit and get paid for it. Seems like the profession of choice for me. I am a good shit talker. Anywhoo. My main point for this whole blog will be this. There are a number of reasons of why this woman is liked or disliked. I do not agree with some or her standpoints or views. Or the fact she likes to say 'faggot'. But I ultimately see the bigger picture. Many women in the adult industry being from models,dancers, etc.. she says alot about how this and that and this. She capitalized on using her pussy to gain fame and a name. Is that so wrong? Or the fact that she is the biggest walking contradiction is what is wrong... I have been thru many of the same things as far as growing up fatherless, being raped and living the dancer lifestyle. I get SO tired of people using there excuses to shield from the bigger picture. So no one can see.I cannot relate to fucking celebs or fucking for money. But i have realized in the past that I have tried to fuck away my pain. Tried to fuck away my loneliness.. And there is something wrong with that, but it would ultimately be up to me to change that. I think lots of young black women use sex to suppress many things. But don't our black men do the same thing. Us as a people in general if you would want to get technical. But it's most definitely not something to make a career out of or even be boisterous about. It's about do we change this and teach our daughters, sisters, friends, to be powerful women by knowing the lessons of life. Or do we let AIDS and chlamydia corrupt women til we are here no further. Stop buying this bitches books and feeding into her vagina scandals. She is an embarrassment to women everywhere. She says smart things, that she has learned from some OG stripper. period.You are not a role model. You are lost soul.

be safe wayne. we need to keep them platinum records coming.....

Black vs Skin vs Reality = Distortion

2009-10-26T13:25:00.000-07:00

BlackWhiteGreenPurple. The race thing is really out of hand. Its sad that people really are going out their way to say 'I'm bi-racial, I don't want to be indentified with being black?!?' But that is a portion of your race. That is fine to want to be noticed for being biracial, I suppose. When your mom's and pops were fucking to make you I am sure they weren't like...'Oh I would love and old mexican n black baby!' Its really redundant.

I would blame a lot of different people for these 'image misconceptions' I know I may be considered 'Light Skin' But to most of the white people I grew up around. I was still being called a nigger. My 'light skin' didn't save me from being called a nigger or being made fun of because of my skintone. When I got around black kids they teased me even worse than the white folks. OH she think she cute cause she was mixed. I really never cared about my skin tone because my family never made it an issue. But being a child you process things. I think I thought everyone made a big deal outta something that didn't matter cause I have white aunt's cousins, etc.

Frankly. At 8 you could kiss my ass and miss with that light skin shit, i had barbies to play with and pranks to pull.

It hurt my feelings that people cared so much about things like this. but in time you just start to see that people's perception of beauty, what beauty should be is completely entirely distorted. People are reaching for shit that barely matters.

If you really are a 'disowning' your race. Your are disrespecting everyone that has struggled to get you to the point where you are now in life. Your ancestors and role models have paved the way. It shows sheer ignorance for you running around worrying about being 'mixed' when you go to job interviews them white people don't see you as being mixed. YOUR black. no matter how many combinations you put together. White people consider every person with hue. and a partial nap.Black. true story. There are way too many issues out here to be worried about than PUTTING BLEACH ON YOUR DAMN KIDS TO GET THEM LIGHTER.

now really, being a beautiful brown shade bothers you?! to the point where you would die to be LIGHTER? You can have my damn skin tone and see AIN'T A GOT DAMN THING GONNA CHANGE! who cares! Teach your kids how to be strong black men, how to survive REAL obstacles that they are going to face. Instead of drenching them down in man made chemicals. THE fuck is wrong with america? I don't want to be apart of this bullshit. You mean to tell me that shades of skin is more important than our lazy celebrity president not doing a damn thing but photo ops and twittering for innanet health care. I don't get jiggy with this shit. I don't appreciate my dollars going to any taxes until this fucked up economy is fixed.

And all these dumb ass rappers don't help women feel security or make them feel beautiful when they running to the first off brand 'so called exotic ho' they see with ass shots! Videos are filled with all kinds of wavy haired broads. Cast some different shades already. I am tired of all these kim kardashians, rosa acosta's, and whatever the fuck martian planet hos they be finding. show variety.

I don't give a fuck about you people or this wack shit you stand for. Get some orginality about yourself. Stop letting america dictate your happiness.

various love

2009-10-24T12:06:00.000-07:00

The moments have melted away
Time has slipped from the fingertips of him

Questions of infidelity have crossed our minds

Still we push into each other's sanctions
Whispering these wrongs are not making it right
Too deep inside to look back
Sweat interrupting every second thoughts
Now that he has left me in doubt

Of all the things I have done

Weary and torn another night
Telling my soul it will be warm tomorrow

High off the wanting to be wanted
Known the deceit behind those eyes

Telling me sweet lies

jesus no.

2009-10-05T23:28:00.000-07:00

please tell me they aint doing this still.....

Feeding The Void

2009-09-18T00:13:00.000-07:00

By Yours Truly.
Please don’t mind my terrible punuation; I truly didn’t plan to be at this place with my image in my early twenties. I remember growing up and always feeling awkward about being, well…lanky and slopped over in a sense. I was small breasted for a long time. So that was something I always wondered about. When was I going to get some titties! In time you grow up, and things begin to fall into place. I never was the girl that wore tight clothes, or showed the goods. I was a little tomboyish I liked my baggy shorts and t-shirts with odd things written on them. Like ‘brat’ interesting enough. Glad I made through a bit more stylish now a days. I didn’t start paying really close attention to my body until I turned 18. Amazing huh, I spent my teenage years worrying about things teens SHOULD not have to worry about. I think something that will have a profound impact on body image, is really considering sitting down and explaining to our young women of the future about body image, ways to deal with being happy, and the most important healthy lifestyle. It really doesn’t seem like my community takes too much concern in health care. I most definitely believe that being ‘healthy’ is a fundamental part in society. Maybe someone should offer free classes for single mothers on nutrition. As much as they like to say the shit is out there… It really isn’t.
I could go on and on about this but I can say this contributed to the things that are to come that brought me to this place where I absolutely felt compelled to tell this story. I have seen so many friends of mine going thru the same thing. It breaks your spirit. It pretends to be your best friend. It is the Kleenex to your tears after he doesn’t call. It doesn’t talk back or have the wrong perception of you.
Food.
It is something you need for survival but can cripple your survival all in the same moment and breath. You never been starving but always hungry to climb this ladder and these expectations the society would like to call success. It has taken me my entire life to get to the point where I am right now, mentally and emotionally everyday is a struggle. I look in the mirror and wish I could bewitch my way out being ‘chubby’ but the reality is, by America’s standards…Whatever that is anyways. I am considered obese. Now with this being said, do I feel out of shape definitely. I am overweight in this moment in time. Yes, but. I have zero desire to be slim. It’s just now what I want. I like being 160 even if I am short. That what makes me happy and that is all that should matter. YOUR happiness. YOUR dreams. The resolution starts with you. If you come to this turning point where in yourself you see mistakes, flaws, beautiful things, a strong woman, a go getter etc... Then you can turn your destiny around be you once you have the quality to know that is a bigger, brighter picture.
So let me know how you feel about Feeding the Void, there is most definitely more to come and feel free to submit ideas and stories to sodamnglam@gmail.com xoxo.

lovelife.

2009-09-13T14:32:00.000-07:00

This department store has no room for love or the idea of love
I appreciate you effort(s) they show promise
Not enough to win the hearts of hearts
Not enough to keep the suitor of your choice.
Stop playing a game you will never win.
Monopoly is for the intellectual.
We merely met the base.

xoxo

Fck Artificial Shit.

2009-09-08T01:38:00.000-07:00

Email seems to sum it up, I'll re-say it.

Her.....

U act as if you think Im not gunna make this right. Or that Im not saying that I fucked up. I said all of this as soon as you found out. u didnt even give me a chance to explain what happened. You just flipped out and choked me!i HAVE BEEN TRYING MY BEST to live up to every promise I have made to you. And all in the process Im trying to work on the way I treat people. Im really hurt that u didnt give me a chance to say anything. Im stressed, youre stressed.. and the alcohol only made it worse. U STILL dont know what happened. And yes, I did hit her ass.. maybe just not soon enough. It was a very dumb move, and u act like u losing keys doesnt effect me. I thought we were in this together, and truthfully, i must admit I should have punched her as soon as she jumped in the car. I promise I didnt want to hit you, it was a natural reaction.. u wouldve done the same thing. I would have NEVER put my hands on you, if the roles were switched. EVER. I would NEVER hit you. well, at least not first. I understand that maybe my words are just as harsh as a fist, at times... U dont think I love you? U dont think I keep you in mind with everything I do? You dont think I would leave you hanging do you? I havent. I may fuck up, but I never LEAVE U OUT TO DRY. I speak the best things about you, Kevin and everyone else who knows me knows how I feel about my Pam :-). Ill still give u the money to straighten this situation out.pam

Me.....

Excuses. Thats all they are. You should have had your ass in the club dancing. Instead of outside trying to be seen and heard. You want everyone to pay attention and see you. Sit down and be quiet sometimes you might learn something. I have tried and tried to keep destroying my own self for the sake of a friendship that doesnt exist to you. So what you talk about me, you love me? You love yourself. Clearly. I would NEVER ever do anything like this to you. You fucked me over a thousand times and all their is is excuses. Its time to take responsiblity you call yourself rushing me and this that and the other. And you still ain't making no fucking progression from twenty mins ago. Do you get it?

Regardless of what your talking about right at this moment. You being the passenger damn near co-pilot of this car. It is your personal responsibility to go hard. I am not believing you can give me a bloody nose and you cannot do nothing to this chick. Give me a break. I am sick and tired. All this negativity all this drama. I rather be broke and homeless. Than setting myself dealing with someone who has all these things going on mentally. I get mad, I get sad who doesn't. You flip out all the time about the dumbest things. I never ever ever want to speak to you again in life. I do not want a single thing to do with. I do not care about where you go what you do nothing. Get yourself together. Don't think about me. Don't worry about me, NOTHING pertaining to me. Keep the money. I just want you away from me? Don't apologize I don't want emails from you. I do not care about what your going thru. NOTHING. You put your wellbeing and mine at risk. I ASKED you if you were okay to drive. You lost my keys to a car that is not registered to me. Do you have any idea what that means? You made me look like a fool 5 times now. Do not sit and act like I have never done anything, I consistently stay by your side and you repay me with this. You are a mean hateful person. That is why bad things keep happening to you. Like I said in my blog. IF someone does something to jasmine you want to hurt the closet person to you. So I can feel the same hurt. Toxic. I can live the rest of my life never having a single thought about you from this point on. Your personality is no longer the same. You changed. I am moving on.

with that being said....

Let's break this shit down to a science. I want people to really understand my point of view. I can be a idiot. I have made not so smart decisions. I will learn and move on there has to be something bigger waiting right? I been quiet all my life but outgoing at the same time. Its worked in my favor to a degree. I really don't think at points in life everyone is meant to hangout socialize whatever yall call that shit. If God made us all friends, there would be no hell to be raised. I am totally never and you won't catch this bitch being fake. It is something I don't have energy for. It takes too much effort. Alot of people have split personalites and portray a picture that is more of a mirage.

I get tired of people DOING me dirty and thinking that justice is served. I didn't wrong you, you wronged me. Since we are going to be messy, I will air everything out. We can be grown women can't we Keita or Jasmine whoever the fuck you claim you are. See I have many different names and i have seen and done many different things, that still at the end of the day makes me Pam. I am not in the business of pretending and putting on a show for a bunch of motherfuckers who wouldn't give two fucks about me tomorrow.

I have real genuine friends and they have me. They know I will always be there for them no matter what. That is the type of person I am. I blame myself for keeping toxic negative energy in my space. When I was wronged by you the 1st 34 times I should have closed the chapter. I kept hoping for the sweet person I knew at some point and time. But for what reason? In life you going to meet people who are just no good.

People who have nothing better to do than be evil and pessimistic and petty. I never once ONCE did anything to your ass to deserve the fucked up shit you say and do. If you got an issue with me still handle the shit. Don't go talking shit to whomever. I am right here. I was down the hall two doors down from you last week. I am sure you knew that too right? You wish i was still around to be the 'fall guy or the butt of your jokes' Sorry GOD, keeps blessing me with better things to do than negativity. I am not going to keep letting you get the satisfaction you are not my friend, but I am not going to dog you out to others cause you show your true colors everytime you say some negative shit about me! Dig your own grave. Build your own house don't worry about me! I am fine! You know that I am sure. I am pretty sure you are following me still even tho i blocked you.

I was dumb as fuck to keep trying to be a friend and love someone who doesn't even love themselves. So yes, I can take responsiblity for keeping a dead ass monkey on my back. So to you, have a wonderful and successful career at whatever you choose, I simply don't want anything to do with you.

That is a personal decision, yes you lost a person who loved you dearly at one point and time, and DID whatever she could, but nah homegirl I am good on you PERIOD. We had a good run, its over. Now with that said. Duece Bigalow.

Stripper of the Day

2009-08-17T15:45:00.000-07:00

Mahogany
Uh yes. I have seen this lady @ Rolexxx live and in person. Very sweet girl. Very good dancer. Let's go broke

*throwing dollas*

Why Won't You Just....

2009-08-16T23:05:00.000-07:00

Michael Jackson - Leave Me Alone
Uploaded by jpdc11. - Watch more music videos, in HD!

Seriously.

The Remedy. To Your Solution.

2009-08-08T05:48:00.000-07:00

You got a big ego
Funny thing is. Everyone seems to be full of shit these days. I mean. I wish I could carry around fiber laxative to shove in these morons face, some people need a full fledged cleanse. Seriously. I mean. I am a naturally outgoing, goofy person. Its a part of who I am. I must definitely don't mark that as a 'defining' moment in history. But in all there might just be some people you meet in life and you say 'That is just a cool ass person' or 'She just lies a lot, that is who she is.' Good or bad. Characteristics never change to say the least. I do the best the day allows me to do. I cannot make things happen my way. I cannot change things I have done beforehand. But I can be the person to make up the i was a jerk or a asshole etc. I find it quite narcissistic that everyone has these BIG ole egos and persona's. That belong to someone else. I mean sometimes you have to take yourself out of a situation, out of a mindframe to put yourself in a certain position. Completely becoming irrelevant to yourself....Might not be the answer nor the solution to your problem. Your still a asshole. And she is still a cunt. You see my point? Songs and media and society has all the wrong people thinking that the ladder they are trying to acclaim is obtainable by doing this or doing that. To me that is just an outlet. A scapegoat if you will. The grim reality is. You are just you. Why all the extra toppings, melted drama. Life is one thing for certian not a movie. No one is going to press pause. ''

http://www.blippitt.com/times-drivel-twitter-users-are-narcissistic

When Will You...

2009-06-13T05:04:00.000-07:00

shut the fuck up.

WHAT in the world is wrong with people now of days, when can you stand back and say enough is enough. Why is someone doing s o o oo ooo oo much to prove a point that still pans out to be completely irrelevant. Sometimes saying nothing is better than saying anything at all. We are all out here living life as best as we can. Why not make it easier for yourself and back the fck up. Sit the fuck down and read a BOOK. Or do a word search you mindless peasant.

Please Be Quiet.

2009-05-13T00:19:00.000-07:00

Can I have my wig?

I know the reason why Asians never hire black heffas @ hairstores.cause they aint shit. Today Auntie Keyona Kutthroat Jackson. Was cutting the fuck up in the hair store. She was telling bitches to get out. This was a broke ho free zone. I had this face...

i was kinda scared to say something cause she was hood as hell. She was loud. You could tell her what you wanted. Cause she was telling you what YOU need to get. Serious note: This job should be given to unemployed nice person who wants to be there. Cause I aint ever heard of the rules she was making up. I been wearing wigs since I was 2 years old.

chilllllllle boo.
giiiiiiiiiiiiirl lay.
flat.

Seriously.

I was offended and she backhanded ~~KeitaEden~~ and forced a wig on her ass. Told her to get the fuck on.

Seriously.

is the only thing I can say. Unless I reenact this YouTube.

Phat Ass. LOL

2009-05-08T14:16:00.000-07:00

Lot of Bitch Ass Nigga's Who Fell Off.

Literally.

idowhatiwantsodontaskmenoquestionsmynigguh.

Make ME Over.

2009-05-08T06:17:00.000-07:00

I have a lot of fucking make up. These are just some palettes some two were ordered via ebay. One from Marshalls. One From Icing. I have *Drumroll* Over 2grand worth of cosmetics.

Wishing I could pawn this shit. ;
/

Stripper of the Day,

2009-05-08T05:59:00.000-07:00

Yes I said. Oh Yes...

her name is Chyna. She is fine as hell. Damn I cannot get to miami fast enough. SHIT. Come on Keita Let's hit diamonds up. ASAP.

Strip Me Down.

2009-05-06T19:46:00.000-07:00

Uh........ I could be entirely over people forcing you to be WHAT they want you to be. I cannot just wake up and be thinner or more attractive or less of a bitch. The cards are falling down. I am what I am. You or no one else is obligated to like it. We can all say big words and throw around theories of perfection. My heart is made of pure steel. Sorry folks. I only have enough space to give a fuck about absolutely nothing. Be mad. Be judgmental. I am still doing me. And your STILL doing you. So.

Again. NOT strip club material? Fine!

I know i need to work out. I have seen worse! this is me! Taken today! <3

I Found Your Twin! #1

2009-05-06T12:16:00.000-07:00

This may be rude...

But I found your twin. I love reuniting people. I

am the modern day humanitarian.

Don't rush to thank me.

ay ay bitch.

2009-05-05T23:37:00.000-07:00

I hate to be the one to tell you this....
but when you see this sign.....

that does mean. You go speeding past me trying to fit in the lane that is meant for me. I have the fucking right of way you dumb ass fuck. That means that if i am traveling and you see this sign before you see my automobile that you slow down and let me pass because...

i have the fucking right of way you cuntswaggler.

the next bitch that tries to squeeze their sorry ass car in the lane with mine when i have the right away. I will get first throw anything without value at your car. Meaning pennies and McDonald's cups and bags etc. Second I will follow you to your home and beat the dog shit out of you.

Thank you.

Why Must You?

2009-05-02T23:56:00.000-07:00

there is a perfectly good reason I have my porn on mute. via this outstanding dick limping shit this guy decides to say....

my baby batter?
uh....

mute. always. your protecting yourself from more than 'extra listeners, protecting yourself from potentially losing that nut..'

s i d e || n o t e

2009-05-02T03:33:00.001-07:00

these eyebrows are clearly an insult to my intelligence. I do not encourage this obvious display of disrespect.

Typical Shit

2009-05-02T02:59:00.001-07:00

"if the shoe fits....force it?"

Ah the creatures of the earth we call men. To no avail we will sit and stare at the phone with bewitched nose twitching waiting for it to ring. For the longest time men were the furthest thing from my mind, I know how I got to this point. But going in I really did not know why IT is so hard to maintain a relationship with a man. I had no idea what I was signing up for when I decided to date men. I felt as if my so called ‘girlfriend’ would throw infidelity out the window as fast as the ‘typical’ man would. Then why just date women? Why not date them all, avoid being exclusive, and call it day. Sounds great? Right? No one wants to be in a relationship but no one wants to be a alone. The ultimate catch 22 in my eyes. So what would be a solution to a seemingly easy problem? I say be single. But for some reason. The economy sucks so I cannot be single without having to pay someone’s cell phone bill. Yes, I am such a good Samaritan for that FUCK Shit. The crazy thing about what I am going threw right now is I knew I loved this person as soon as I laid my eyes on them. That ultimately sounds like some 1986 crap. But in all it happened. So what do we do now, that we have to pay these bills and get this recession shit out of people [s] vocabulary?

chile boo.

chile please.

chile stop.

I don't know why the word 'chile' amuses the fuck outta my simple ass. But it does.

I went to the club I don't know why I keep putting myself thru the moving cymbalta commercials but...They got the worst niggers running the club. AFRICANS? yes, epic fail. He told a stripper I broke a 100 dollar bill and he told some musty twat hoe to give me a dance. Then...Some other mudduck said " Yall look alike cause you both got curly hair and glasses" [blank stare]

I never wanted someone off my lap so bad. I know my jeans need to be washed with monistat 7.

Christian Strip Club.

2009-04-30T22:35:00.000-07:00

"Wet 'N' Wild Cosmetics & Undesirable Bloomers?"

Lord take me now....I have seen everything there is to see now. Officially. In Virgina you are not allowed to dance with out a bathing suit on or your Sunday best. You got to be kidding. You also cannot walk around the club with out being covered...These bitches carrying rugs and blankets and sheets around?

Could not complete this sentence with the help of a good friend of mine

Dancing has officially became utterly ridiculous on so many levels. I wish there was a soul to turn to offer a good word in the NAME!

The recession is oh so real. I could die everytime i hear that. It must be for bitches to wear panties and old bras as costumes... After you been dancing for 4 years. A crossover is due. It's no excuse to not be manicure

Oh wow. Is all I am left with. Then this hunchback with sideways ass bootyshots done with canola oil. Hops her quickweave wearing ass on the stage with me. Without asking is a capitol unspoken NO.

so...two men fucking each other without laughing. Is hilarious to me.
[side note : watching gay porn ]

i am so pissed off. Too many noises out side. Scared. to close my eyes.

Cumming On 200 Thread Count Sheets.

2009-04-29T12:58:00.000-07:00

Saving the world....One fry at a time...

Oh the agony of this boredom. I sat today and last night and masturbated to Lacey Duvalle's teeth. How did she get so curvy? I remember her looking like an ironing board. hmmm. Interesting. To say the least. Then I masturbated to Jada Fire. She had her thongs on inside out which made me go soft. I masturbated to . That is always a good time. But...cumming on cheap ass sheets soaks the whole bed up. I mean really. I felt like I could tear the shit apart like a piece of notebook paper. I need to step my game up. Start cumming on satin so that shit can roll off the sheets.

Me is Keke Maneater are going to try to get me some employment at this place....

On a serious note tho. The club really does look something similar to this. Not that many attractive 'peeps' none the less. I don't mind cause I would a smaller fat person of the club. SO sweet! I been hanging tough trying to stay away from penis but I slowly see myself inserting some disk in my ram drive. hahah. That was corny. See what this Hood Hop ass city is doing to me.

Lady Gaga. There is a big pink dildo waiting at the end of this tunnel for you baby. Don't fight it.
Just lay back and let me insert. XOXO. If I sprinkle glitter on that discostick.

Uh...Kinda Sideways.

2009-04-27T21:34:00.000-07:00

They love trivial stories about the girl with the Big Mac.

I am a little pissed about straying outside my box to finally get up the courage to eat carbs and order my fat ass a pizza. And they fucked up the mood with putting fucking spaghettio sauce on that joint. My first reaction was to go back and bust the windows out the pizza joint. Or smack the negro who recommended anything outside of Papa Johns should be considered on the hitlist. Virgina could possibly be the most boring fucking place I have ever been in my whole life. The speed limit is 35 for the whole city. Even on the freeway, I guess it gives you alot of time to think....? My lady is flying to Los Angeles I hope she has fun, so she can come back and suck the corn residue off my big toes. I have waited LONG enough. I really have nothing of interest to talk about. Just making my first post. Ciaos.

Oh yeah. I have 3 mosquito bites.